We spent the majority of this weekend on our boat. Lessons learned include the following:
- No matter how hot it is on land, it can be pretty chilly out at sea. Take about 27 more layers of clothing than you think you will need. Or expect to a shiver a lot.
- No matter how cool it is at sea, you will burn. Wear sunblock unless you want to come home looking like a beetroot. Especially on your face.
- Take a hat with you. The sun dazzles back at you off the water, and even with sunglasses on, you will still get a stinking headache if you don’t wear a hat. And you definitely don’t want a headache at sea, because…..
- No matter how strong your stomach may seem, when you combine a choppy sea with hot sun, and the combined smell of fish innards and petrol, you are going to at least feel sick, if not actually be sick.
- Despite this, when you are out on a boat, you get a serious case of the munchies. Take lots and lots to eat. But not lots and lots to drink, because…..
- Women on boats have certain disadvantages when it comes to the loo. Especially when you have guests on the boat with you. You may need to cross your legs for a really long time.
- The idea of reading/knitting while the men fish is a very seductive one. But if you are the kind of person who can’t read in the car without feeling nauseous, it is only on the stillest of days when the sea will be calm enough to allow you to read without feeling nauseous. And knitting is a great idea, but when you are perched on the front of the boat, you may find that there isn’t anywhere for you to securely put your ball of yarn while knitting. And you don’t want to go sit in the cabin, because its tiny and smelly and too hot.
- Time can go pretty slowly on a small boat, especially if you can’t read or knit, and don’t want to fish. You can amuse yourself for a while by watching the men fishing, but it’s surprising how quickly the novelty of that wears off. Once you’ve seen one dead fish, you’ve seen ’em all. Oh, and by the by, the idea of fresh fish sounds wonderful, but you may feel differently about eating a mackerel when you saw it alive alive-o only a few hours previously.
- Oh, and the idea of having unlimited amounts of free fresh fish to eat may sound wonderful, but just wait until your freezer gets so full of fish that there’s no room for essentials like icecream and vodka.
- If you feel seasick, you may be pretty happy when the boat pulls into dock. But when you step onto dry land, you may not feel so great. It’s a little disconcerting to have the floor lurching under you as though you’d been drinking for a solid three days. And it takes quite a while to wear off.
And yet, despite all of this, there is nothing like messing around in boats. Roll on next time!!